When I was 14, I was sexually hurt by an 18-year-old (he was 17, then 18 soon after). I wasn’t ready for anything sexual, but he had started touching me and squeezing my chest. He left bruises on my chest and his handprint on my lower back when he would smack it. He would ask if I “wanted to” and I said no, but by the time I said anything he was picking me up or sliding me down the bed and taking my pants off, putting himself in me. I said yes when he was already inside me because I was terrified of him. He was taller and stronger than me. I’m 5’2 and he was 6’4. He was rough, it hurt me and I had to pretend that I liked it so he wouldn’t hurt me more. Other day he would start doing it all again but ask to do it in the “other”, I say no, and he grabs me. He roughly pushes himself in me and I push him away, but he continued. I have trouble using the bathroom even now and I’m 16. I was asleep and he got on top of me. All I remember is my back popping